So, dear diary, I must update you as to this latest chapter of my life. Finally, something out of the ordinary has happened! As I was walking through the woods, on my way to find my fortune in the world, I stumbled across a confusing group of males who were in a panic about some lost children they were attempting to track. Men never can find anything without a woman’s help, now can they? So I—being of the helpful sort of female—agreed to join up with them to help them with their quest. Perhaps there will be fortunes to find and treasure to be had with this band of creatures? Only time will tell. There was a elf (who seems to be nicknamed “Fancy Pants”) and who appears to be overly fond of napping especially at inopportune moments, an earnest-looking cleric, a blustery dwarf who likes his drink, a strong but silent warrior-type, and a weasel-y looking character who insists on calling himself “Danny the Cat” and who is obsessed with his outfits and who has a habit of blundering into everything….I’ll have to keep my eye on that one. Something is not right about him…..The others have not revealed much about themselves to me, but seem trustworthy enough for the moment. Until I get to know each of them better, I’ll have to keep my watch up.
It seems that a group of bandits broke into a local village and stole all the children and were on the way to a snake tower with them! Poor children! A snake tower doesn’t sound like a very good place to bring curious, frightened children. But, men will be men, and who am I to laugh about it?
We came across an odd little man who was able to give us directions to a local bandit camp. And then on our way there, we ran into yet another man—both blind and demented—who gave us the way to the Snake Tower. How fortuitous! Soooo…after a bit of walking, we spied the bandit camp through the trees…..many men eating, drinking, and doing manly sorts of things. The group was uncertain what to do next, so I let them know that I had the ability to perform a bit of magic that would put the entire camp to sleep so we could then sneak in un-noticed to search for the children and treasure. They agreed, and so I put the camp to sleep.
Threading our way through the sleeping bandits, we discovered two of the children locked in a cage on a wagon. We freed them, woke them up, and assured them that we were here to rescue them, then I took them off to a safe place away from the grisly throat-cutting that was taking place. I did not want the children to be frightened by the sight of blood and gore after so much had already happened to them! After calming them down, we were able to question them to find out about the other children. They pointed in the direction of the Snake Tower and so we agreed to head there, but only after the weasel-y one came up to me and handed me a beautiful yellow sash as he mumbled something about my outfit…..hmmm…he’s an odd one, all right….and besides….this is no place for girly, flowing robes! I’d get caught on bushes and thorns and all matter of burrs would be sticking to it.
We set off towards the Snake Tower and after a while, could see a wagon in the distance, surrounded by bandits. We came up with a plan for the others to flank the wagon, while I protected the children from any fighting and gore. Usually I prefer to be right in the thick of it when there’s excitement to be had, but in this instance, I only had a lowly dagger compared to the mighty weapons of my bandmates. Also, I did not feel up to performing any more magic, so I did not think I would be of much use, and so I reluctantly agreed to stay a step behind to protect the young ones, who were, after all, the reason for our quest towards the Snake Tower.
A battle ensued…from my vantage point, I could see the wagon in the middle of the road, but unfortunately all of my fellows were obscured by flora and fauna. I could hear shouts and then noticed that they died down on one side, and that some bandits ran from there to the other side suddenly. Worried that one of my compatriots might be in need of assistance, I told the children we were going to play hide and seek and that they should stay here with their eyes covered ’til I came back to find them. I snuck down my side of the road, eventually coming across the fallen elf, who I quickly bandaged and looked after until he was stable. Worried at the sudden silence, I crossed the road and bandaged one after another of my mates, finally ending with the so-called “Cat.”
Our weary, broken group banded together and decided to rest a bit before continuing on. The horses had long since run off with the wagon towards the Snake Tower and were no longer in sight. I went back for the children and brought them to our makeshift camp, then settled down for some much-needed rest.
Meanwhile, the Snake Tower beckons….